I am pleased to announce the opening of the Family Wellness and Psychotherapy Center in Woodbury Connecticut. This will be my primary location starting June 15th. You can find out more about the center at www.woodburytherapy.com.
I am happy to be adding another location for Saturdays. The address is:
Middlebury Chiropractic & Wellness Center
590 Middlebury Road
Middlebury, Connecticut 06762
I am accepting new patients at both the Middlebury and New Fairfield location.
Happy New Year!
How comfortable are you at work? Are you able to be yourself? If not, why and how does it effect your performance? Are you a manager at work? If so, how can you help your employees be more comfortable? Do you work in a creative industry or have departments within your company that require supporting the creative nature of those around you? Supporting your employees will increase production. It will lead to a positive work environment. If you are a manger who would like to increase comfort levels within your team, check out the article link below. Doris Clark and Christie Smith offer helpful techniques for connecting to employees.
I am back in Connecticut after a short hiatus while living in California. I continue to work with clients online and will be offering face to face sessions soon. Please stay tuned for location information. In the meantime, feel free to check out Christopher Bergland's article, "Loving Thy Neighbor as Thyself Makes us Healthy and Happy." You can find it here: Loving Your Neighbor. Mr. Bergland explains the critical importance of staying socially connected as well as caring for yourself and others. Please feel free to leave comments below and I look forward to seeing you soon.
What is your level of curiosity and what does it say about you? When you interact with other people or learn about something new do you have questions? Would you actually like to know the answers or do you feel inclined to ask? Do you have an internal drive to learn more about other people, places and things? For some people, the questions are anxiety based. They may not actually care about the answers. Do you actually listen to the answers or has your mind already moved on to formulating more questions? Does being curious actually change the chemistry of one's brain, which facilitates learning? When you brain is stimulated to ask such questions, what is actually taking place within your brain? What are the benefits versus disadvantages? If you are interested in the topic, you can find out more by reading the below linked article, written by Adoree Durayappah-Harrison. Please feel free to comment on the article or ask questions.
Whether we are discussing a serious or nonchalant topic, it feels good when we connect with someone through agreement. Yet, as we all know, this is not always going to happen. And, that's okay. It's actually not healthy to never experience disagreements within intimate relationships. Some people feel rejected when their partner disagrees with them. This most likely stems from childhood experiences and each person has to take responsibility for themselves. If we each practice empathy while taking part in conversations which involve disagreements, we will stay connected while still being independent.
Dr. Leon Seltzer discusses the topic in his article, "Every Couple's Key to Peace". You can find the link below.
When I saw this post I immediately said yes. I love being busy and admit to missing being "crazy busy." My main goal is to get back to that place. But, is that really best? I have addressed this issue before and am doing so again because Lissa Rankin's article is definitely worth the read. The article also cites Dr. Brene Brown's book, Daring Greatly:How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms the Way we Live, Love, Parent and Lead. This is another amazing book. The section Facing the Truth is straight forward and may cause you to feel a bit uncomfortable. That's okay. If you're open to examining your life you will feel uncomfortable at times. The article addresses possible solutions and the importance of spirituality. You can find the article below.
Dealing with unfinished business is never a good feeling. When you are involved in a relationship it is important to improve communication which leads to a resolution. Linda and Charlie Bloom have written an article which lays out the steps to help you finish the unfinished business. You can find the link below. As stated in the article, the process may be uncomfortable at times. Yet, we need to take that risk in order to improve our relationships. The article speaks to those in relationships. We are not talking about unfinished business as in looking for closure when a relationship ends. That's a topic for another article which will be addressed soon. http://blogs.psychcentral.com/relationship-skills/2014/02/8-steps-to-finishing-unfinished-business/
Recently I was talking to a colleague about the topic of commitment. We can all contribute to this conversation and there are so many different life stories that relate to commitment. Psychology Today has a variety of online tests that people can take. For some people these tests are simply for entertainment purposes. For others they are starting points in making the decision to begin the journey of self discovery. If you would like to take the Commitment Test you can find it below.
Stress. People talk about it daily and deal with it differently. Some juggle it marvelously while others report feeling swallowed up whole by it on a regular basis. Of course it's that time of year that people report feeling an increase in stress. The truth is it can be present year round.
The first thing I read this morning was a wonderful article from the Institute for Life Coach Training adapted from the book Total Life Coaching by Tony Williams and Lloyd Thomas. The article offers a plentitude of ways to manage stress. We can practice the techniques whether we are faced with small, daily stressors of the big ones in life. We encounter all throughout our lives. Instead of attempting to dodge stress, we can actually work with it.
Here are the 15 tips that are highlighted in the article:
- Know that stress does not exist outside you. You are in charge of your stress level, and can learn to manage it to your advantage. Discover and exercise your strengths. Consistently seek more efficient and effective ways to deal with stress and accomplish what you want.
- View change and "problems" as challenges, not as loss or threat.Keep in mind that everything changes. Allow yourself to "float on the river of life." Search for the opportunities, not the obstacles, inherent in change. Convert the stress of change into excitement for meeting a new challenge.
- Have a continuous positive orientation and outlook for yourself and others.William Arthur Ward once wrote, "The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails." Give attention to what you find most valuable. Set priorities. Be consistent. Focus on the present moment. Spend your time and energy in ways that meet your values and standards.
- Develop flexibility, agility and tolerance for ambiguity and uncertainty. Ensure flexibility in your approach by being willing to quickly modify what isn't working. Explore new roles and possibilities. Learn conflict-resolving skills which lead to "win-win" solutions. Intend your conflicts to result in everyone getting what they want. Forgive easily and readily.
- Use language to create meaning and context for change, achievements and solutions. Everyone needs to feel important. Use a vocabulary that recognizes and appreciates others. Nobel laureate, Hans Selye, in his groundbreaking research on stress said that "gratitude is the most stressless emotion."
- Identify the things you can control and focus energy and attention on them. Avoid spending time, energy, worry or thought attending to things over which you have no influence or control. Instead, give attention to what you find most valuable. Set priorities. Spend your time and energy in ways that meet your values and standards. Focus on strengths.
- Refuse to get derailed by those who are pessimistic, resistant or discontent. Explore other possible points of view. Look for the positive in every situation. Define a problem as a challenge or opportunity for a new experience or the development of a new skill. Look for humor in your life. Attend to the positive qualities of yourself and those of your family members.
- Take 100 percent responsibility for your responses. Winston Churchill once said,"The price of greatness is responsibility." Use and control your own impulses. Develop your own, accurate belief system and act accordingly. Drop some commitments when you have too many.Under-promise and over-deliver. Give and receive feedback that is relevant and important to managing both the risks and possibilities associated with anticipated or desired change.
- Refuse to take personally the tensions and conflicts brought about by change or by those people around you. Set your own standards and boundaries and let other people know what they are. Accept others' boundaries. Really listen to others and respond from your understanding of their expressed point of view.
- Have confidence in your ability to influence events and circumstances around you. You do have an impact not only with your actions, but also with your thoughts and energy. Success guru, Napoleon Hill wrote,"You have absolute control over but one thing, and that is your thoughts. If you fail to control your own mind, you may be sure you will control nothing else."
- Take excellent care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Maintaining a balance in all of these aspects of your life will minimize your stress and maximize your health.
- Frequently debrief with others. Have a community of people who are optimistic, passionate and oriented around possibility, creativity and opportunity. Make new friends. Be a friend to others. Touch each other mentally, emotionally, physically, affectionately and gently.
- Continually renew and update your knowledge and skills. Never stop learning. Invest yourself in a meaningful way. Serve or do someone else a favor. Persist in gaining self-knowledge, growth, goal-attainment and self-improvement.
- Allow yourself and others the space to experiment with fresh approaches. Encourage the expression of new ideas, solutions and viewpoints. Explore other possible points of view. Accept your friends and family members for who they are now, and realize that nobody is perfect all the time. Give yourself lots of encouragement and positive, self-affirming statements. Give lots of "positive strokes" to others as well.
- View setbacks and mistakes as natural and necessary aspects of risk-taking and learning. View failures as stepping stones toward success. Let go of your problems. Define a problem as a challenge or opportunity for a new experience or the development of a new skill. Reward yourself.
I recommend reading through the principles, practicing them in response to various "challenges" and taking note of what works best for you. Feel free to share your thoughts on the techniques as well as how you are doing with managing stress.
Best wishes to all.
Everyone has a different response to situations and individuals that may be described as aggravating. Some people appear to have no reaction in the moment and then explode emotionally as the day progresses. Others believe that they have no detrimental response, but their reaction combine with other emotions and surfaces months or even years later. Then there are those who react in the moment. They get so fired up that they report not being able to see or think clearly. Dr. Marcia Reynolds, author of Wander Woman: How High-Achieving Women Find Contentment and Direction, discusses various ways to deal with difficult situations and individuals. You can find the article here:
Just a note about the book Wander Woman: This book can be beneficial not solely for woman, but also for men who are in relationships with woman, whether personally or in the workplace.
Hi Everyone, I'm writing to give an update on my services. I recently moved from Connecticut to California, therefore I am no longer practicing as a therapist at my office location in Bethel. Yet, I am offering online and phone consultations. These services range from life coaching to career counseling. These services are self-pay only.
I am also in the process of creating a new website. The site will have my new business (married) name and go into further explanation of services offered. The new site is HeatherJonesInc.Com. You can still reach me through my current contact information and I will keep you updated.
Wishing you all a wonderful holiday weekend.
It's a wonderful thing to be surrounded by meaningful conversation. It can also be fulfilling to connect through sharing. This does not take away from the importance of silence. It is often what connects us on different levels to each other, ourselves, a higher power, and helps us gain a sense of clarity. It is the type of clear thinking and being that is not possible when one is continuously thinking or talking. An article which explores the topic of Silence is, The Art of Silence by Dr. Alex Lickerman. You can find it here:
Author Mike Bundrant lists nine possible signs that one is blocking themselves from love and attachment. It's worth checking out if you are questioning your own relationships and happiness. You can find the article here: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/9-ways-you-unwittingly-deprive-yourself-of-love-and-fulfillment/
It's almost summer! Below you can find a link for a variety of summer camps in the Connecticut and New York area. http://fairfield.nymetroparents.com/article/Fairfield-CountyCTCamps-and-Summer-Programs-for-Kids-2011-Guide
I will be out of the office from Wednesday, May 1st until Tuesday, May 7th. If you are experiencing an emergency, please call 911 or go to your local emergency room. Thank you,
This Sunday's New York Times was filled with so many great articles, that it wasn't easy to pick just one for this week's post. I finally chose, "The Light at the End of Suffering," by Peg O'Connor. Suffering and Addiction are key components of the article and the author explains both in a wonderfully intertwined manner. If you'd like to check the article out, you can find it here: http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/04/07/the-light-at-the-end-of-suffering/?src=recg
This Sunday's New York Times ran the article "The Stories that Bind Us," by Bruce Feller. The theme of the article was the following concept: The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative.
This theory was formulated by Dr. Marshall Duke, a psychologist at Emory University. The article explains how one's resiliency can be related to how much knowledge they have in regards to their family and where and who they came from in this world. The article also touches on the importance of family tradition and how this can help children as well as adults.
Some of us are still lucky enough to have grandparents, aunts, uncles, or even close family friends to narrate the stories. For others, we have to take on a more active role in asking questions and seeking out the stories. This can be for the well being of oneself, for one's children as well as future generations.
If you'd like to check out the article you can find it here: